in of forward motion through activities and adventure. Physical pain is simple. Mind over matter, I can push my body without ceasing. But my soul, oh my soul! How do you push something so abstract and placeless? Building up endurance and acceptance will lead me where? You can only keep saying I'm young and still learning for so long. Why, does it seem, that so many people relinquish the quest for knowing so early on? Settle, never will I. But mustn't I? People seem just as happy as they are unhappy all of the time. Happiness, then, is irrelevant when seeking. Happiness is just as much as unhappiness is, no more or less. So, it's not about happiness. It's about experiencing together. What you choose to experience is based off of available experience, exert choice over every situation but accept that choice has its limitations. No longer do I want to care for others for sentimental reasons but now, for the first time, because I realize it is the only choice I can make. Warm and fuzzy has faded, my love is available and extended often but only because it must be. Don't take that as being cold and shut down, it's just the only way. Disillusion robbed my heart of what really is. I give because I have. I cannot create intentions anymore or pull bananas out of thin air, they exist before me or they do not.Someone, please, put a wrench in my hand. It's time to get greasy.
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